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A Lutheran, Muslim, and a Jew die in a car wreck together and end up in line at the Gate to Heaven together. The Lutheran walks up and Saint Peter asks his religion and then
checks his books and says, "Lutherans: room 11, but be very quiet going
past room 4."
The Muslim walks up and Saint Peter tells him, "Muslims: room 8, but be very quiet when you pass room 4."
The Jew steps up and is told to go to room 6 and to be quiet passing room 4. Curious, he asks, "Saint Peter, why does everyone has to be quiet while passing room 4?"
Saint Peter says, "Room 4 is Catholics - they think they are the only ones here."
The Muslim walks up and Saint Peter tells him, "Muslims: room 8, but be very quiet when you pass room 4."
The Jew steps up and is told to go to room 6 and to be quiet passing room 4. Curious, he asks, "Saint Peter, why does everyone has to be quiet while passing room 4?"
Saint Peter says, "Room 4 is Catholics - they think they are the only ones here."
Two Irish nuns, old and
young, were sitting at a traffic light in their car when a bunch of
rowdy drunks pulled up alongside of them.
"Hey, show us your tits, ye bloody penguins!" shouted one of the drunks.
The Mother Superior thought this would be a good test for the novice,
and turned to her, saying, "I don't think they know who we are -
show them your cross."
The young nub rolled down her window and shouted, "Screw off ye
little fookin' wankers, before I come over there and rip yer balls
off!"
She then looked back at the Mother Superior and asked, "Was that cross enough, Sister?"
